Cancer. SUCKS.

My friend is going through chemo right now and is documenting his journey.

Take a minute to send some positive vibes his way, and if you want, check out his blog and leave an encouraging word. 

Much Love.

Me, My Dog, Cancer, and My Beard

Quick note...

When you begin to manifest your dreams, 

you may be surprised to find, 

that everything starts coming together.

Some how,

some way.

It does.

I'm not here to ask why,

I'm here to give thanks 

because I am on my way

slowly but surely.....on my way.

Samantha Heberlein Photography

Jim Carrey and some pretty awesome words...

I listened to a commencement speech that Jim Carrey gave quite a few times...and walked away with some pretty amazing and inspiring words I wanted to share...

"You can spend your whole life worrying about the pathway to the future, but all there will ever be, is what is happening here.
And the decisions we make in this moment, which are based in either love or fear.

So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality.
What we really want seems impossibly out of reach and ridiculous to expect so we never dare to ask the Universe for it.

You can fail at what you don't want, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love"

Dreams. Limits?

Today I want to talk about dreams.

Awake, or asleep. Those thoughts, wishes, hopes, desires we all have... Dreams. 

They lack just one thing to become reality...

Action.

To start this entry, I think something first needs to be addressed, and that is "limits". 

First, a definition from Google.com: 

1. 1. a point or level beyond which something does not or may not extend or pass.

   • 
     
   • 
     
2. 
   

   2. a restriction on the size or amount of something permissible or possible

By definition, limits are basically a stopping point. A no fly zone, if you will. No further outcome or possibility are possible. The limit. The end.

When we talk about dreams, there has always been this dark black hole sucking the life out of those dreams, and that one thing.....is limits. 

I have a question! Who exactly sets those limits? When we are young, and we play dress-up and make believe that we can do and be anything. We REALLY really mean it. The fierce desire to be exactly what we may have dressed up as was so intense, that if anything thwarted our very real potential reality, a tantrum or tears would follow. Dreams were crushed, because a limit was set. 

But, I'm confused....who set it?

Was it our parents?

Was it the mean girls in the hallways of high school that would tease you? 

Is it society?

Other men?

Other women?

Politicians?

WHO SET THE DAMN LIMITS?

With the extent of physical constraint (which is limited to constraint of your physical being)...who has control over the dreams that you have, inside your brain, your soul, your body...?

Anyone?

I THINK the answer...is...no one. No one else has control over your dreams. If freedom is what you seek, then dream! Dreams are freedom. Who would stop you from your dreams? 

You. 

Me.

Me, myself and I.
Us as individuals.

We are our own worst enemy. We set our own boundaries. We set constraints. We create limits.

OF COURSE there are other human beings that feel the need to step outside of their bubble, without permission or consent and trample on our beautiful, vibrant and shiny dreams. Take their spiky Louis Vuitton heels and stab that dream right in the heart, watching it bleed and picking up that beautiful lifeline and dragging it across the cement spelling out "Y-O-U A-R-E N-O-T G-O-O-D E-N-O-U-G-H".

Sure. There are always walls to scale, and oceans to swim, and and and and and....

but in the end.

In the end.

We set our own limits.

Let's go back to this conversation of people trying to crush your dreams. I don't really understand these people.

A smart woman once told me....STOP! When we say that, aren't we always talking about our Mothers? Anyways.

A smart woman once told me that "some people really think that there is a shortage of dreams, a shortage of love, or luck! As if, because someone is having a really good day, or someone falls in love, then THAT'S IT! That's all there was. There is none left for you, or anyone else. "

I thought to myself...holy crap that is totally true. I understand it now. Don't act like you haven't looked at Engagement photos, or Sonograms, or travel photos and thought "UGH screw them!!! That's so dumb! Sure just rub it in!" (I admit it! I have been there!) Where do you think that all comes from? Jealousy. Why are you jealous? Because you don't have that one thing. Who says you can't have that one thing? NO ONE. 
Yet another example of limits.


We have dreams, people try and make us believe that there are limits, and we believe them, and we allow our dreams to be crushed.

This has to stop!!!

DREAM, PEOPLE!!! 

Sit down and meditate about it, write it out, paint it, photograph it, do whatever you have to, but don't stop. Whatever you do. DO. NOT. STOP.

I am going to be that person that says, THERE IS NO LIMITS! You can decide right here and now that you will give everything you can to make those dreams come true.

Don't let anyone or anything stop you. Surround yourself with those that empower you and support you.
It is not going to be easy. By no means think this is going to be a simple task.
BUT it will be worth it.

SO if you are ever feeling like things aren't going right, or that the road to your dreams are getting too rough, or that too many people are trying to bring you down...come back to this post and read it again!!! because...

 Y O U   A R E   G O O D   

 E N O U G H 

and on top of that....

YOU ARE LOVED

YOU ARE NEEDED

YOU ARE WANTED

YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH TO LIVE THE DREAMS YOU HAVE DREAMT UP.

I hope that this post allows you to open your eyes to new chances, and possibilities, and maybe even...stops you from crushing someone else's dream.

And last but not least, from a favorite band of mine.....

'"Take what you can from your dreams,

 make them as real as anything..." 

-Dave Matthews Band

If you happen to be on Pinterest and need some inspiration 

check out my Inspirational Board

It's where all these quotes came from :)

Yesterday I took part in Tough Mudder- Michigan. This race is 10-12 miles of running through mud and working through and over obstacles. The best part is? You cannot do this race alone. Everything is about camaraderie. I ran with 2 other fantastic strong women, and 4 other determined, equally fantastic men. All of which had my back in one way or another.

I also learned something this weekend. Maybe not something completely new, but something I now see in a different light.

When we stood at the beginning of that race and looked up to that American Flag with the National Anthem playing in the background. I took that all in. My personal thoughts on Religion and Politics aside, I thought about what that flag not only means to Americans, but for those seeking what that flag represents.

Freedom. 

I ran through 12+ miles of mud, completed some obstacles, others I couldn't. But I did my best to turn around and make sure everyone within' arms reach of me was assisted in whatever way I could assist them.

Pyramid Scheme is a slanted wall, where you have to literally stand on each others shoulders and allow others to climb up you to reach the top. Every step you take, you want to apologize because you know that person you are climbing is probably hurting as much as you are, if not more. You can't guarantee where you're going to step. Here's the best part of this race...once you have climbed your teammates and have reached the top. You have two options, keep moving to stay warm and get the race over with faster, or turn around and put your hand out for anyone that needs it. Our team was awesome. Without question each person stayed where they were and helped people up the wall. I stayed at the top with my arms outstretched for anyone to grab on to. As soon as I started sliding down the wall with the weight of the man I was trying to lift, my ankles were grabbed and I didn't have to look back to know that was my team holding me.

Photo from Tough Mudder

At those moments, you do not ask questions. You don't care what someone's religion is, their sexual orientation, what side they vote for, what they did yesterday or what they may do tomorrow. We came together, not just my team, but also the individuals on the wall next to us, to accomplish something bigger than us. The goal was to finish, and with this race, there is no man left behind.

When my legs were cramping and my lungs were giving out, other females were passing me with ease. Yet another moment that tests you, not physically, but mentally. Do you give up and be angry that the other girls are doing better than you? Or do you keep pushing and cheer them on and encourage their fight in a male dominated race? 

You cheer them the fuck on! You tell them to keep pushing! Because although you may be behind, you are THERE in the race with them! You are doing your best, and you are challenging yourself. THAT is what matters. 

Looking back, we often take advantage of what we're "allowed" to do.  I am not blind to the fact that there are plenty of other places on Earth that would not only NOT allow a female in a competition like this, and any attempt to take part, would likely end in punishment.

So I stand proud of this Freedom that I have to stand side to side with men and run long distances, scale high walls, tear up my legs in the dirt and rocks...because the reality is. When we are all covered in mud, we all look the same. We're all in the same fight together.

I think if everyone had to take part in this race. EVERYONE. 

This world may be viewed in a very different way.

Team Heisenberg, Tough Mudder- Michigan, 2014

Thank you to my teammates for encouraging me, pushing me, challenging me, and helping me. Special thanks to Curtis who stuck with me the whole time, and to Micah and Colin for letting me climb them. I'm so sorry. hahahaha :) Love you all!!! Bib #33832

Proceeds from this race go to the Wounded Warrior Project. Thank you to all of the men and women that risked or lost their lives serving.

May one day, there be peace.

Have you ever seen those fundraising websites where people can put their dreams out there and ask for assistance funding them? 

Well if you haven't....now you have :)

Help me chase my dreams!!!!!!

Looking Back...just for a minute.

Today I took some time to look back on old photo albums I have on Facebook as well as the entries that are on this blog. It is interesting how just a few photos can pull back emotions, feelings, love, sadness, adventure, laughter, peace and fun. 

It makes me desire more travel and adventure, and to get my camera back out and start shooting again. Where have I been? What have I been doing?

This leads to the question I have faced a lot this year.... 

"Are you happy? or just really comfortable?"

I think I finally know the answer.

Taking a chance on my dream...when will you, on yours?

As previously discussed....I'm working on making some serious changes...If you would like to help me along on my journey, go here to donate :)


http://www.gofundme.com/e1icjw

Update since the last post- through pictures of course!

Reconnected with some old (and amazing) High School friends:)

Spent a few weekends on the lake with these beauties!!

Trav is still doing wonderful and my parents
 adopted this Siamese and named him Lucca Spaghetti!

Successfully completed Tough Mudder 2013, signed up for Round 2 this September!

 Liz and I at the MSU vs UM Football game...shortly after...
MSU won the Rose Bowl.....No big deal....:) 

I took my first painting class- here's my painting!

Celebrated my 29th Birthday by having some lovely ladies
in town and enjoying some Microbrew's and OAR up close!!

Went to Baton Rouge for a work trip and took vacation in New Orleans to see my lovely friend Brooke!! What an amazing trip and I plan on going again! Maybe for Mardi Gras this time!

My lovely friend Erin got married to a
 childhood friend and announced she's pregnant with a boy!

Attended my 14th and 15th Dave Matthews Band
with some AMAZING people!
(Also died part of my hair purple, LOVE IT)

Did some makeup, styling and photo's
 of my dear friend Toria!

Took my first Encaustic painting art class!

Decided to change things around to set myself up to be the healthiest i can be before turning 30. Heavy weight lifting and upping my running again!

Change is coming...

Fall is coming, and so is a major change....

Hands Helping Paws

Hello everyone!!! I have decided to make an ongoing fundraiser for a few shelters in Michigan! This will go to helping shelters in need of supplies, free spay and neuter clinics and helping turn over the kill rates in Michigan Animal Shelters...Thank you!!!!
Hands Helping Paws

Two posts in 1 day? Can it be!!?? Michigan and all its beauty.....

Being someone that has seen many sunrises and sunsets from different spots in Michigan I can truly say that Michigan is amazing. It has SO many natural beauties. The dunes, national forests, waterfalls, gorges, Great Lakes, inland lakes, Mackinac Bridge and highways with tree's that canopy you as you pass. You cannot find many states that can say they encompass all of these wonders.

Let's go over one thing at a time.....

The Sand Dunes: Located along but not limited to, much of the west coast of Michigan, dense population in and around Glen Arbor area. For more detailed notes on locations and entrance points to the dunes, follow this link! Lake Michigan Sand Dunes!


The dunes ARE HUGE. They are never ending. Try and climb them, as fast as you can (only if a Doctor approves it) and not stop. It's pretty much impossible. People don't realize how big they are. They think "aww a sand hill!" No. No. Not a sand hill, sand MOUNTAIN! They are DUNES! Climb to the top of a tall one and you can see... MORE sand!! It looks like a desert. In Michigan. Yes, it is torture climbing them. Yes, that sand gets wicked hot in the middle of a summer day. Yes, there is nothing more frustrating than climbing for 5 minutes and only getting a few feet up the dune.
BUT.
There is something about sitting in that sand, your calves and thighs burning from your ascent, skin prickling from the hot sun taking in the view of Lake Michigan. Don't worry, I didn't forget the fun part.......getting down the dune. You can be lame, or awesome getting down this dune. You can either walk down the dune (lame), or leap down the dune (awesome).

**WARNING: Learn how to do this before you try it, you can really hurt your knees (or just yourself basically) if you don't do it right. Also not suggested for people afraid of high speeds or eating sand.

Leaping down the side of a dune is the closest thing you can get to free falling. Bounding down the side of the mountain of sand jumping as far out as possible with your next leap leaves you feeling weightless and you can feel gravity doing its job. It is impossible to leap like this and not have the biggest grin ever cross your face, sometimes a scream comes out when you jump out further than you thought you had and you catch air for MUCH longer than anticipated. It's ok...just calculate your landing and enjoy the ride!!

Suggestions/Tips: Stretch before you climb, wear cool clothing, bring a hat/sunglasses, wear sunscreen, bring plenty of water, TAKE YOUR TIME, find a dune that drops into a body of water (Silver Lake Sand Dunes for example), look back during your climb to take in the view (it changes every step you take higher), don't forget your camera!! Take a deep breath when you get to the top and enjoy the view!

Just in case you thought I was lying...here are some photo's from Dune's trips I have made....

The view of Lake Michigan from the Dunes, Glen Arbor, MI

Never ending climb.....

Silver Lake Sand Dunes


                    A special note about Sand Dunes....Sand Dunes are fragile, yes it seems like..."it's a pile of sand, what do you mean it's fragile?" trust me. They are. They shouldn't be abused (DON'T LITTER). 

~TAKE NOTHING BUT PHOTOS,LEAVE NOTHING BUT FOOTPRINTS~

 

Have any questions? Leave it in my comments! :)

I guess I should write something...it's only been 6 MONTHS!!!! (Be prepared, it's a long one)

Oh MY does time FLY! I can't believe it....Now I must get my synapses firing to figure out what I have done since my last post....

BOOM.

I figured it out.....A LOT. A LOT of things have happened. I moved into an apartment that is nothing short of a large college apartment. It's not my ideal place, but it will do for now.

I GOT A BIG GIRL JOB. Whatever that means exactly...other than I work during the day (as opposed to the Vampire hours I was used to at the bar). This also means I get most weekends off (pretty decent perk I must say). I now work at Michigan State University.

I must say this, I NEVER thought that I would still be in East Lansing. I thought for sure IMMEDIATELY following graduation from college (MSU), I would move out of state and never look back.
Oh how I was wrong. I DID leave the state...but only for travel. I have been to many places across the USA and almost every corner of Michigan ( I still need to tackle some of the boarder of the Upper Peninsula and East Coast).

Synapse Fire/ Something Shiny Caught my Eye: Next Post- My tribute to the Beauty of Michigan

"Being someone that has seen many sunrises and sunsets from different spots in Michigan I can truly say that Michigan is amazing. It has SO many natural beauties. The dunes, national forests, waterfalls, gorges, Great Lakes, inland lakes, Mackinac Bridge and highways with tree's that canopy you as you pass. You cannot find many states that can say they encompass all of these wonders"

Ok, back to my original post.

So I have found this job at MSU in the Outreach department. What does this mean you ask? I am a part of the Residence Education and Housing Services department. We are responsible for distributing knowledge to incoming students and parents regarding living on campus as well as making them aware of the academic and social resources you have access to while living on campus. I was the lead on the creation of the Residence Hall Tours for Academic and Parent Orientation. The planning began in mid- February and we wrapped our final our last friday. It was a VERY long,tedious and tiring project. The challenge was awesome and I can say that it is very satisfying starting a project and seeing it through to the end!

Other things I have done since my last post.....oh ya...I ADOPTED A CAT!:) I had been looking at the Humane Society for weeks at different cats, waiting for one to jump off the screen and into my heart. Yes there were many cute faces, but you don't know until you are there in person. I visited with the point of  adopting an older cat (Older pets and black pets are the last to be adopted, people don't want a pet that's "just going to die soon anyways" and black pets are "intimidating"....I call BULLSHIT). When I showed up and tried to say hi to the older cat I had been looking at for weeks, I could feel this cat was terrified. She was NOT ok with fast movements, loud noises, being surprised, or anything that would elevate her heart rate. I was so upset that I couldn't comfort this cat, all I wanted to do was love it and take care of it. After sitting for an hour outside this lovely cat's crate, I had a heart to heart with her. Yep, with a cat. She needed an older persons home to live in, she needed an elderly to move slow around her, and not have many people in and out of the house. My heart broke, I knew that it was a no-kill shelter but the idea of these animals having to live in a shelter another night was too much. I burst into tears. After calming down and having a talk with my mom over the phone about her, she consoled me and said "why don't you take a look around at the other cats, they ALL need a home you know!"....so that's exactly what I did.

I opened a few of the play area's and saw a ton of kittens, I didn't want a kitten, I knew they get adopted first, and I didn't have the time or ability to commit to a kitten. So I moved along. I entered the last room and approached a lounging tabby, she purred like a chainsaw when I pet her, she came up to me immediately and sang the song of her people. As soon as that happened, I heard a "thump" and looked up at a black and white face staring down at me from a high perch. He galloped over to me and stopped and sat to stare at me, sizing me up. I kept paying attention to the tabby girl, but kept this guy in my peripheral vision. He looked at my again and went back to climbing as high as he could go. The bell sounded and it was closing time. No cat for me. Sad again, but determined to find a feline friend, I threw up the white flag for the day and went home......until 2 days later.
Tarzan was his name, being my cat was his game.
The next time I stepped into the cat area of the Humane Society, he galloped up to me again and as soon as I sat down, he hopped into my lap like "quit screwing around and take me home already". My parents were with me and looked at me and said "Samm. This is your cat".
After filling out paperwork, learning about medical history, and buying a few necessary items, Tarzan was mine.
First thing that needed to happen? Immediate name change....I read over his story, because each shelter pet has a story.....
"Tarzan is a pretty lucky guy. He came to CAHS through our trailer park grant; the residents at the park said that there was a black and white cat that had gotten a flea collar looped around his neck and one of his front legs, but no one was able to get him for us. On the second to last surgery day for the grant, they finally got him! So he came into the clinic to take a look at his wounds. They were pretty extensive; the collar had slowly worked its way into the skin under the arm, and left a pretty large gash. Given that there wasn't anyone to care for him, and the severity of the wound, we spent a long time talking about what might happen to him. But, when CAHS agreed to take him once he was healed, a volunteer stepped up to be his foster mom throughout his healing."

So Mr. Tarzan had been through alot. He has a scar on his neck and his underarm from where the Flea collar embedded its self. He loved high places and needed to explore every closed off area, so I chose a new name for him...... Ladies and Gentlemen let me introduce you to.....

Traveller

"Trav"

He is the most amazing cat ever. I seriously lucked out. With the exception of his wake up calls 5 minutes before my alarm goes off in the morning, he is even tempered. He has a great sense of humor. He LOVES catnip toys, he loves cuddling, and chirping at birds, squirrels and anything that moves outside. He will find his way under fabric until he is surrounded like he is camping. He still climbs anything and everything. Literally. We have chairs at home that have what look like steps as the back rest and he climbs the thing like a ladder until he is up as high as possible. This cat and I were meant to be. Best friends for life. I am SO glad I adopted, and he as much rescued me as I did him :)

*As for the other 2 cats, the older cat was adopted by an elderly lady just looking for some companionship, and the tabby went home with its sibling to a couple looking for a friend :)

Last but not least, I decided since I no longer compete in competitive team sports it was time to start doing some more races.....So this summer I have completed 3! I plan on doing more this fall, so I will keep you updated!

Mackinac Island Lilac Festival 10k

  

TOUGH MUDDER 12 Miles

Lansing Color Run 5k



Ok, that was a really long post.....sorry. I will continue writing, lots of posts, just shorter ;) Hopefully. I hope everyone is having a wonderful summer!!!

Saying goodbye to pets....not easy....

This morning, we had to say goodbye to our 11 1/2 year old rescue dog, Pez. She passed after complications from some surgery so instead of picking her up this morning to come home, we must now adjust to her loss. She was a good companion to us and to her beloved Hannah and to our great dane, Matilda and she will be missed. Safe home Pezzie. There's a giant mountain of Milk Bones and Hannah, happily waiting for you in a spring time park....

Contributing to Yahoo is a joke!

Apparently when you send in articles to Yahoo, they are extremely picky about what they want to publish. SO I will just post what I wrote on there...HERE! The article was supposed to be about keeping a New Years Resolution...so I wrote about keeping the resolution of "giving back to your community"! Enjoy, and please pass on the advice to anyone looking to volunteer!!!

We have all clinked glasses at Midnight with "visions of change" dancing in our head, but where do we start? It's simple really! I have put together "5 Steps to Giving Back". Follow these steps and you will be well on your way to keeping your resolution and making a difference in someone or somethings life! 
Step 1- Decide which organization you want to assist. The Greater Lansing Area has many organizations in need of assistance. There are Homeless Shelters, Food Banks, Animal Shelters, Health Clinics, Safe Houses, etc. If you are nervous about volunteering, maybe stick with something you are more comfortable with. 
Step 2- Decide what kind of assistance you want to provide. 
Do you plan on just writing a check? Gathering donatable items? Volunteering your time? Throwing a fundraiser to benefit the organization you chose? This step you should take some time to think about. Places that need assistance are more than happy with anything you are able to provide. Nothing is too small. If you plan on writing a check to donate- Call your organization and ask who the check should be made out to. They may ask you to drop it off in person, or provide you with an address to send the check. If you want to collect items to donate- Once again contact the organization or check their website. You may be surprised the items some places need, it can be anywhere from a washing machine to kleenex! If you chose one of these two options, all you have to do is collect the items and drop them off/send them into the organization you chose. If you want to be more hands on, move on to Step 3. 
Step 3- Getting involved. If you are planning on giving your time by volunteering, you must contact your chosen organization. They will provide you with a list of volunteer jobs that need filing. They will also give you times and dates to come in to discuss your part in volunteering. Some volunteer jobs at Safe Houses and Homeless Shelters may require a more in depth interview to be sure you would be a good candidate in assisting. Some may even have a training day for you to better understand what happens at the organization. If you choose to throw a fundraiser, a staff member will sit down with you to discuss your plan, and the next steps to take. 
Step 4- Pass on the word! If you ever give back, make sure to pass on the word that you did, and what you did! You may be surprised how many people never know where to start. With these steps you can now assist others in giving back as well! 
Step 5- Give yourself a pat on the back! Congratulations you just kept your Resolution, and helped someone in need! Giving is the best gift and it is the best feeling in the world. 

Here is a link to search for volunteer opportunities: http://www.mivolunteers.org/ 

Samantha grew up in East Lansing, she has compiled hundreds of hours volunteering, spent her winter break collecting donatable items and making blankets for the cats and dogs at a local animal shelter. Over the years she has helped raise more than $500,000 for the Greater Lansing Food Bank, by assisting in running the Empty Plate Auction.

The Truth Project 2013

What if you found out that your deepest, darkest secret was something you had in common with countless other women? If you could write that secret down with complete anonymity and send it to a place where it could join thousands of other secrets women keep hidden in the deepest parts of their hearts, would you?
Be a part of The Truth Project 2013 
We are gathering these truths into a book project throughout the calendar year of 2013. 
We do not want your name. Mail us a brief note saying the thing that you dare not say out loud. Your truth may be one sentence or one short paragraph. It does not matter why or how it happened; it matters that it did happen.
Please do not share the names of people that may be involved with your story. Please, do not give us your own address or contact information. You may type or legibly, handwrite your contribution. We prefer that you mail your truth contribution to the address below and, again, please do not give us your return address. If you would like to share your age or the state or country where you live, we would appreciate that, but it is not necessary to participate in this gathering of anonymous truths.
It is our sincere hope that as you read through the hundreds of entries, you will see that you are not alone and that our common stories; even those that appear to be our darkest moments, are shared and understood by sisters in secrets everywhere. We hope that this revelation of shared secrets will allow you to lay your burden down, even if it is just for a moment. And we hope you will know that none of us are ever, truly, alone.
Visit the blog below for instructions on how you or women you know can participate in this project. Please feel free to pass this along to any women you know.

Mimi & Samantha, Co-Authors and mother & daughter

The Truth Project 2013